Florence Little

How do I begin?



There is nothing quite like the sting of loss; no other feeling to even remotely capture the heartache that it brings.  Even forewarned, death steals its victims and leaves those remaining stunned and numb.  We knew her days were numbered, and we knew she hadn't been herself in a long time.  She was ready to go.


I cannot even begin to tell you how highly I esteemed my great grandmother.  She was 90 years and 130 pounds of proud, powerful, faithful spunk.  For years she has been fighting her decaying body, and for years she has told the doctors what will and will not happen to her.  They told her they had to amputate her foot and that she would never walk again; she refused and was walking in what seemed like no time at all.  They told us after her stroke that she may never be able to form complete sentences again; she could carry on full, although limited, conversations a few short months later.  She never gave up for her family and, at the end, for herself.

She was my hero. No. She is my hero.


It's funny how the Holy Spirit moves within us on the day that a loved one departs.  I knew it this morning, but I didn't realize I knew it until after it happened.  When my Aunt Karen passed away suddenly in a car accident, I knew something was off that day.  It's like a piece of my heart had already started to break. Today was like that, and I barely held it together all morning....  All day I couldn't explain why I felt the need to run home and hide.

Grand Mom Mom went home to be with her Savior, her parents, her siblings, her friends, her son, her granddaughter, and many others that she truly loved.  I know that when heaven's gates swung wide open for her, she had an army ready to welcome her in and she found indescribable peace.  I know that heaven rejoiced in adding such an amazing new saint into their number.  And as strange as it sounds, I feel like her spirit is sitting here, watching me blubber through this, trying to tell me that she's found such great joy and to stop crying for her.

I know, very soon, I will be able to rejoice in remembering the amazing life that she lived.  I will share stories and pictures and maybe even videos (if I can) of her and you will fall in love with her as much as I have. Soon, I will celebrate her immense joy now that she is without pain and surrounded by those she hasn't seen in years. Soon.

But tonight, I cry. No, I weep. I weep surrounded by my pile of tissues and snuggled up next to my purring cat who is wondering what is wrong with me.  I weep selfishly, knowing that never again will I get to hug the woman who always represented to me who I should aim to be.  I weep because I didn't take the time to go see her when her health really started to deteriorate.  I weep because now it's up to me to make sure that I follow her example.

Gran Mom Mom, I adore you. I am so happy that you have finished the race.  I pray to someday be  able to be half the woman you have been during your time on this earth.  I love you.

"SB 2K13"

St. Patrick's Day -themed font!

Not that I actually get spring breaks anymore, this week I was able to attend my last round of training for work in Irvine, CA.  Situated just behind a curtain of small mountains, Irvine is almost on the coastline near LA.  Having never been to southern California (or the Pacific Ocean for that matter), I was pretty excited at the prospect of spending 5 days studying near the ocean.

This last round of training incorporated the final skills required for me to be a full "hybrid."  I learned techniques to use timing and voltages of the electrical signals in the heart to make a detailed map of the arrhythmia in the heart chamber of interest.  Here's a quick snapshot of one of the maps I made, if you're interested.  

Not only does this require a full understanding of the minutia within the anatomy, but also the electrical conduction system and its deviations in abnormal hearts.  Now that I've finished my last set of classes, I have about 60 days to become fully certified to do cardiac ablation mapping procedures on my own.  

Enough about work.  I flew into Orange County on Sunday evening, and my lovely friend Bonnie picked me up from the airport, birthday cupcake complete with a lit candle in hand.  We decided that since it was St. Patrick's Day, we should hit a few fun spots around town before checking into the hotel.  Needless to say, read yelp reviews carefully.

Bonnie and I stopped at an Irish pub and made up our own rules to darts-and ended up tying!

The first few days of class were pretty normal; we were at the office from 8-5 and had a few assignments and quizzes tossed in to review during the evenings.  I enjoyed seeing some classmates from previous courses as well as making new friends (there were only around 12 of us). 

On Wednesday, I had the fortunate pleasure of getting to see my favorite (girl) cousin, Amanda.  She moved to CA late last year and I hadn't seen her since she came to visit Darren and me last summer in St. Louis.  Amanda picked me up and took me to one of her most favorite places in the area, Huntington Beach.  We drove down the "PCH" (Pacific Coastal Highway) and I got my first glimpse at the ocean.  After catching up over a yummy Italian meal, we stopped at one of her favorite little souvenir shops for me to pick out a little gift for Darren (poor guy, being stuck with Lenny all week).  It was so lovely to get to see family, and especially Amanda since we both just celebrated birthdays.

As it was our last night in CA, a group of classmates and I decided to go to Laguna Beach at sunset and then eat in a restaurant with an ocean view.  I was very surprised by how chilly the beach was...being from Texas where the Gulf is rather warm, I guess I expected Southern CA to be the same.  Despite the cold, I rolled up my jeans and kicked off my sandals in order to feel my toes in the sand as the waves crashed over them.  I took a few moments to breathe in the salty air and even tried to call Darren so he could hear the ocean (I don't think it worked very well).  Here are a few pictures I took on the beach.  

Friday morning brought our final exam and practicals, which were no trouble at all.  A quick goodbye and trip to the airport and I was ready to be back in St. Louis...that is, until I read on my weather app that we're expecting 5-8 INCHES OF SNOW THIS WEEKEND. When is it going to end?! Be ready for more "I can't believe it's this white" pictures very soon....

To change subjects, thank you so much to all of you who wished me a happy birthday!  Physical distance doesn't feel so far when people like you take the time to make me feel special.  I got some very sweet cards in the mail, and I wanted to let you know they are very appreciated as each one felt like a nice little hug. 

Darren and I celebrated my birthday and St. Patrick's Day by baking some very green cake items. If you would like the recipes, I'd be happy to share. Both the cake balls and the cake itself were quite delicious (all stemming from a green velvet cake recipe).

I also wanted to include in here what one person in particular did to make my day special.  Way back when I started with St. Jude in STL, a lovely lady named Pam introduced herself to me as a fellow St. Jude employee in the cardiovascular division.  Very quickly, we become friends and bonded over our common faith.  It is Pam's church that Darren and I have been attending and really like, and Pam was instrumental in getting us involved there.  Well, on Sunday morning after class Pam gave me a "birthday in a bag," trying to help me have a wonderful birthday despite the fact that I am so far away from family.  How unbelievably kind.  I am truly blessed by those around me and I just wanted to share how wonderful she was to me. 

All in all, I've had a great week. I'm finally sitting on my couch, waiting for my wonderful husband to come home from work.  I was only gone 5 days, but there's something about being married that makes you want to stay with that special person you've grown so comfortable with... he's on his way home, and I can't wait to see him :)

A Date Night on... Everyone?

One of my favorite things about birthdays is all of the mail that you receive leading up to the big day...by that I mean everyone from your dentist to your insurance salesman to any store chain that you've signed up with will send you a sweet little note wishing you well.  Within that note, if you're lucky, is typically a little coupon for x dollars off on your purchase of x or more.  I LOVE these.  It's almost like a challenge, what item can I find that I'll actually use that's JUST over the amount I'm given?

Yesterday was the day I selected to meet the challenges.  I had to spend from 7:30-3:30 at work on Saturday (more on that later), so Darren and I decided that when I got home we would go out on a date to the mall & have a nice dinner after that.  However, this wasn't just your typical date.  Since beginning our finance class at church, we've really budgeted our eating out and entertainment spending...and therefore haven't really gone on many typical "dates" in 2013.  We are fortunate enough to still have some gift cards leftover from Christmas and the lovely Valentine's day box that my mother sent, so we decided to plan out our date night with one goal in mind: spend as little money as possible.

Our first stop was Bed, Bath, and Beyond, where my Uncle Chris had given us a gift card over Christmas.  We always get lost in that store, but ended up finding some things we really needed (like a 9x9 pan for cookie brownies so they'll cook all the way through!) and some things we know we'll use (an all-weather picnic blanket in its own zip up tote).

Next, we headed to the mall with my birthday letters in hand, ready to find great deals.  From Vera Bradley, we spent a GRAND TOTAL of $1.51 on these two items (both originally retailed over $34.00):

Then, at Banana Republic, I got $15 off this little treasure (it goes so well with multiple outfits!):

By this time we were pretty hungry, so we decided to head across the street to Maggiano's, a pretty nice Italian restaurant chain that Darren and I have visited only twice before.  The first time was for my senior winter formal in high school, so obviously we were excited to eat here using gift cards.

All in all, we had a lovely evening and spent only about $20 total.  So much fun meeting the challenge. And thanks everyone for a date night on you!

Now, for those of you who don't have weak stomachs, I'll tell you a little bit about what I did earlier in the day.  St Jude is very invested in partnering with hospital labs to educate staff about our field: electrophysiology.  Yesterday, we hosted almost 60 local/semi-local staff members at a lecture series and heart dissection focusing on EP concepts of arrhythmias, ablation, and anatomy.  My dear friend and coworker, Megan, was there to join me (as were most of the rest of the STL St Jude team).  She and I, however, got to actually sit through all of the lectures and participate in the dissection while the others were leading it.  Here we are at the beginning, full of energy (well, coffee) and focus:

There are two main hospitals that I've been working at, Mercy and Missouri Baptist (MoBap).  Both of them came to join in the fun, and I wanted to show you the people who I absolutely adore and get to spend all of my time with at work.  Not everyone was in these pictures, unfortunately, but here are a few!

Some of the beautiful ladies of Mercy

Some of the wonderful staff at MoBap

Here is my favorite shot of the heart before I started to mangle it up:

Somewhere about 5-10 minutes into the dissection, Megan and I got kinda silly (hey, it was post-lunch and pre-nap). So, we took advantage of the fact that we had a bloody heart and a ready camera.

Pre-dissection pose

Post-dissection pose

We want to drink your blood!

Okay, so finally, one of the COOLEST things about our heart dissection yesterday was that our heart had a Patent Foramen Ovale. Look it up if you want more details, but basically it's a hole that remains from when a fetus had blood flow from the left to right side of the heart before it was born.  When you were born, that hole naturally closed up and became a thin layer of tissue called the Fossa Ovalis.  For some people, it stays slightly open and could potentially lead to some troubles. To make the up-close views not so hideous, I made them sepia for you (you're welcome).

Right below Megan's pointer finger is the hole 

I put a straw through it to show you that it connects the right and left atria

Megan is shocked by this discovery!

Anyway, we had a great time and were very thankful to not only the leaders in St Jude for putting this together, but also all of the people who took time out of their Saturdays to come learn with us.  It was pretty fun and I'm glad to have the opportunity to participate in events like this.

March Wreath

As some of you know, I absolutely LOVE to craft.  Even more than that, I LOVE the month of March.  Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that it's my birthday month, but even more than that I feel like it is the month when the world starts to smile again.  We get beautiful spring weather: sunshine that kisses your skin without making you sweat and warm breezes that reaffirm that summer is on its way.  For most people, March brings a week when you can lay back and take a breath as you enjoy a hiatus from school and work.  March also signifies a transition from being cooped up indoors to finally being able to play outside without a coat.

As we are nestling into this little townhouse, Darren and I have tried to decorate our home with the seasons on a budget.  One of the first places a guest will look is, of course, the front door.  Naturally, I wanted something to welcome them to our home. Thus, the wreath!

I'm a frequent pinterest user, and have seen multiple posts of burlap or yarn wreaths, which look easy enough to make.  With the help of a gift card to Hobby Lobby from my dad (thanks, Dad!), this whole wreath cost less than $20 to make and I still have some supplies left over. I've never done a how-to blog post, so bear with me.  This wreath was extremely simple to make, it just took some time (we popped in the Sound of Music and I was finished by the time Captain Von Trapp and Maria returned from their honeymoon).

Here is a list of the supplies you will need:
-scissors
-hot glue gun and glue sticks
-ribbon (mine is green checkered, 1")
-colored burlap (green)
-jute
-one wreath made of twigs/sticks from Hobby Lobby
-3 sheets each of green and ivory felt
-one wooden letter of your choice
-paint for the letter (green)
-paintbrush

My supplies

The first step I did was I painted the "C" so that by the time it dried, I would be finished with the wreath and ready to attach it.

Next, I started to make my felt flowers. There are plenty of options to choose from as far as how you make felt flowers.  Since I'm not a seamstress, I decided to pick ones that wouldn't require any stitching. I made the same exact flowers in both the ivory and the green, but took pictures of just the ivory ones so you could see how each type was created.

First take a strip of felt and fold it in half, glue those edges together, and then cut slits in one side. On this first one I cut the strips at an angle. I'll show you the difference between the angle and straight cuts later.

Put a drop of glue on one end and tight-roll this, adding glue as you go. Here is how it should look once it's all rolled together:

Now, here is what the straight cuts look like and then the two side-by-side:

Obviously there are ways to add variation.  If you want the petals to be thinner, cut the strips thinner. In order to have a smaller diameter flower, make the strip shorter like these two:

Next are the rosettes. I really like these since they're simple and cute. Cut a circle in the felt, and then cut a spiral within that circle.

Roll the felt from the outer edge in (yes, seems counter-intuitive), gluing as you go.

And voila, here is your rosette!

A variation on this one is a wavy rosette, where you cut the felt in a wave and roll it up to get this:

Finally, one other felt flower I chose is this little ball of wavy petals. You start by cutting 9 equal circles and one smaller one for the base.

Take the first circle, put a dab of glue on it, and fold it in half. Then do the same and fold it again to be a fourth.  Glue that to the base.  Do the same with 3 other circles until you have all four like this: 

Keep in mind that you want the open ends to face the same direction.

Add the next 4 circles the same way, only off the creases from the previous ones. Then take your final circle and loosely roll it, placing it in the center. Fluff up your layers and this is what you get:

So, I made all of the flowers in both ivory and green for this wreath. Here's what I had to show for it...

I took a break from the flowers and used my green burlap to loosely wrap around the wreath. I glued the beginning spot, then again at the end to hold it in place. You may want to add some glue on the back where the burlap comes close to the wreath just to hold it in place.

It's time to finally start putting your flowers on. Now, I didn't have any rhyme or reason for the order of my flowers, just glued them where it looked good. 

After adding the flowers, I felt like there were some holes on the ends and in the middle, so I took my ribbon to add a little bit of color in those holes. I cut strips about 4" long, folded them in half and put a dot of glue on them. In some areas, I wanted more than one little ribbon, so I would glue 2 or 3 together like these:

I tucked them into the holes in the flowers.

Next, I took my dried "C" and wanted to give it a background so I glued the jute on the back. I started at one end, then continued to fold and glue in the shape of the letter like this (ignore the maroon sweatpants):

Here's how the letter looks with the jute behind it:

I put a ridiculous amount of hot glue on the "C" and added it to the wreath.

Finally, I made a quick ribbon holder around the top of the wreath so it could hang on the hook of my front door. 

Here it is, the final product!

I enjoyed putting this together and now will be able to display it every March...and all in time to sing along with the Von Trapp Family Singers before they are chased by the Nazi's!

I hope this helps inspire you to make your own :)